Yes, I see.

So I know that I've been totally lame at updating and I have no excuses since I've had a working laptop for two months now. But whatever, here I am and here's your damn update.

This year has proven to be an interesting one so far. I've had to reexamine a lot of things, concepts, relationships, etc. and it was a lot harder to do than I would have thought, if I'd known it was coming. I went to my first SCA event in June and had a total blast, despite the fact that my asthma was bad enough that I probably should have gone to the E.R. for a breathing treatment. I've been re-bitten by the fencing bug and there's really not a whole lot more out there right now that gives me more joy than having my ass handed to me on the field. I've gotten better at it, and I still have a long way to go and I'm excited to get there.

I've found myself working another unsatisfiying job, which like I've said in the past, really isn't something to complain too much about because I really don't think that most people enjoy their jobs either. I'm not too sure though, I think that I'll start looking around a little to see what else is out there for me. I thought that I wanted a job where I could sit all the time, but what I really want is something with a happy medium between sitting and standing. I get antsy and crazy by the end of my shift and I really wish that there was a way to be off of the phone without getting into trouble. I can't really say that there's anywhere within Discover that I'd like to transfer to either, though I do find it really ironic that I've adopted the "cash only" mindset with my finances and I work with a credit card company and part of my job is to give people reason to stay with the business.

I performed my first belly dance solo three weeks ago, and while it could have gone better, I'm proud of how well I did and I'm looking forward to coming up with another piece. I was going to both Beth and Thia, but with getting back into fencing, Thia's been pushed aside for the past couple of months and I want to get back to her. I'm still not really used to cabaret but I do love learning new things with dance and I want to incorporate them into what I do. That and Beth is moving in less than a year so my days with her are numbered. There are a few other teachers that I'd like to see as well, but I'll see what my budget will allow and how my schedule works out. If anything, I'd love to take from Zacy once her new little one starts sleeping through the night and she can get her ideas together again and if that doesn't work, then the fire-eating lady is just a few blocks away from my apartment so I may go to her.

I spent most of the month of June camping, which I loved. We went to Bryce Canyon, which was pretty but at the same time a bit of a letdown from what I thought it would be. You know how when you go somewhere when you're a kid and you don't quite get it but when you go back as an adult, there's a lot more than what you remembered? Turns out with that one that I had it dead on when I was10 and there really isn't much to do or see there. I do want to go back sometime at night to see all of the stars. Anyway...bit of a tangent there...we also went out to Currant Creek, which was beautiful and far enough away from everything that I no longer had cell phone service (which I needed. Sometimes it's good to be far enough away from everyone that no one can keep track of you). We also drove out to the Uintas, and Moon Lake is something so beautiful that it makes you weep a little. I also learned while camping that I can sleep just about anywhere if given a relatively flat surface.

I've gotten a lot closer to my family this year and it's been a little different, being that I no longer associate myself with the LDS church and at the same time I want to be respectful. The one time that I was asked to pray was the weirdest thing I've ever done and to be honest, I couldn't remember how they do it. I compromise where I can (like bringing Red Bull camping instead of coffee) and don't bring up the things that I enjoy that I know would cause an awkward silence, but for the most part, I'm amazed at how I've made the transition to adulthood and the difference just a couple years has made with my relationship with my parents.

I've made a couple of new friends this year, although at this point they're still mostly familiar acquaintances. Morgan and Kelsey come to mind, and Jesse to a lesser extent. Mostly this year has been about relearning the ropes of my old relationships that I had before leaving and progressing with those. Michael, Chris, Jodi, Laura, Alyssa, Gwyn all are people that I knew before hand and some of the friendships have gotten stronger (Mike and Chris), while others are still out there in the void and I'm trying to get my footing with how they're supposed to be now (Laura and Alyssa), while others have needed to transform quite a bit to mold them to the current situation (Jodi). It hasn't been the easiest of processes, nor has it been the quickest but I know I'll be happy with the results in the end.

I'm still not seeing anyone, which doesn't really bother me much. There are times when I miss physical contact, and I don't realize exactly how much I miss it until I get just a little taste of it and it nearly overwhelms me and makes me want to seek more of it. I dunno, I think I'll put myself out there soon. I'm getting my life back into place and it's almost where it needs to be so I can go out there without getting all mixed up and confused with my priorities again.

And lastly, I'm seriously looking into college again. I know that I've missed the deadline for the fall semester so I'll be looking into Spring but I want to do a couple of classes and I'm trying to figure out how I'm going to pay for them. Apparently, I'm still a dependent according to FAFSA so I know right off the bat that I'm not going to qualify for a grant and I don't want another loan. I'm on fastweb looking a scholarships but I really don't think that any exist for the person who doesn't want to go to school full time. I'm looking anyway and maybe I'll be surprised but in case I'm not, I'm saving my pennies.

Yup, that's what's been going on. Oh, and I've been trying out a new diet, not in the weight loss sense, more of a lifestyle change that involves loads and loads of produce. I've begun cooking and after my terrifying experience of burning garlic a few months ago, I've been happy with the results so far. I can make good soup. And stir fry.